The faces haunt me. They all look smiling and happy. Jovial characters with blank, soulless eyes. There's a way to halt them, temporarily. If I match them into groups of three or more, they'll disappear, but more take their place. They're constantly there.
My name is Jenni, and I think I've been traumatized by Pokémon Battle Trozei.
Which isn't to say that I didn't enjoy the experience. I'm pretty sure that, at the beginning at least, I was having fun. Hurray for a match-3 game that has a Puzzle & Dragons kind of matching mechanic, where I can grab Pokémon faces from around the board and put them with their similar group, but not have to worry about free-to-play mechanics. Look, there are 718 different species of Pokémon for me to Trozei! This will be fun!
Except, after a while, it wasn't just about having fun matching Pokémon. Somewhere along the way, I think about Zone 2, Pokémon Battle Trozei became serious business. The faces keep coming. The combos are always building. The enemies might be mounting an attack. There's no time! I have to keep moving! Why aren't my hands dragging the faces fast enough? I'm sacrificing accuracy.
Whew. Sorry about that. I was having a flashback.
See, like with all Pokémon games, there's a mastery element to Pokéemon Battle Trozei. If you build up enough overwhelming combos and attacks, you can Trozei a Pokémon. Which is pretty much like catching one. However, as I soon learned, higher combos and scores can change the Pokémon available in the zone you're exploring.
Did you know you can catch a Quilladin in Zone 1, Stage 1? Oh, but it won't just show up as a random encounter. No, that would be far too easy. You have to earn that Quilladin. You have to quickly shift around the judgemental faces, criticizing you for never moving fast enough, during the Skiddo, Gogoat and Chespin battles first, building a high score. Anything under 1,500 points simply won't do. Then, when facing Chespin, you must combo the hell out of him. Aim for at least 10, but don't be satisfied unless you're breaking the 15 barrier. Then, only then, will Quilladin grace you with his presence.
There's just so much pressure! Because each stage has some of these special Pokémon. And sometimes, you don't know exactly what the trigger is to make one appear. Perhaps it's just a high score and combo thing, but what if it isn't? What if it's like Zone 1, Stage 4, and I'm falling short because I'm not using a super effective attack to defeat my opponent? But I don't dare look up online to see if that's the case. That wastes valuable moments. I don't have that kind of time!
It's just too much. It's too much freaking pressure. I'm buckling, Pokémon Battle Trozei! You've beaten me! I'm going to retreat to inFamous: Second Son. Sure, there are more decisions and lives at stake there, but it won't compare to the force Pokémon Battle Trozei is capable of exerting.